Wildcard

This is the 5th episode of Private Eye and aired on Youtube on the 12th of February, 2011. Contrary to rumours, this episode isn't the series finale but rather a mid-season break.

Plot
The episode opens with the contestants going about their daily routines; Capser and Morgan playing the Wii and Dakota playing with toys. Scarlett then rushes in and tells them she has urgent news. All the contestants give their opinion on what it might be and then there is a flashback to Scarlett snooping around the house. Her voiceover explains that she was looking for leads on the next challenge - as usual - when she finds something interesting in Joe's room, almost waking him up in the process. They are all confused as to what it is until Casper exclaims that it is a DVD. Scarlett tries to put it in the DVD player with much difficulty. The DVD turns out to be a compilation of audition tapes featuring new contestants.

The first person introduced is Karen Braunstein. She states that she likes sport and that her favourite sport is shotput - causing Casper to skip her audition tape.

The next person is Andrew Hart. He introduces by playing the piano then tell the audience that the reason he wants to be on the show is to spread the word of Jesus Christ, who came to him in a vision.

The third person is Lincoln Breeves, a boy who finds himself unconvetionally attractive, often considers to turn transexual and loves to take polaroid pictures with his iPhone.

The next person is a deaf girl called Patty Ball. She uses sign language to tell people about the qualities that could help her on the show.

The fifth person is Edward 'Celine Dion' Stereotype and introduces himself with a song. After coming back from trying on bridal gowns, he realises that he needs a bigger hope chest and should get the appropriate materials from the craft store.

The last person is Trisha Felts, who films her audition tape with her webcam. She tries to sing the song, "I Will Always Love You", mimicking the popular Youtube vidoe of the little girl singing horribly, but gives up very quickly. She asks her mum if there are any chunkies, presumably biscuits, but to no avail and then says that if she were to go on the show it would allow for hilarious fat jokes.

The DVD reaches its end and the television screen goes fuzzy. The contestants are not too sure what is going on but then Dakota finds a Tv Guide, which is snatched away by Scarlett - telling the audience in the confessional that Dakota can't read. It cuts to Dakota who attempts to read the memoirs of Julia Gillard but then falls over. Scarlett finds the timeslot for Private Eye and reads the episode informaion, exlpaining that the original castmates are shocked to find out that new contestants come on the show. Because of the six new contestants (the same number of original contestants), the four all think that they are being kicked off the show and replaced. It cuts to Morgan eating Casper's socks, which was also predicted in the Tv Guide, making them believe they are being replaced even further.

Joe tells them, quite bluntly, that they weren't interesting enough to last the whole show, confirming their sad beliefs. Scarlett holds Dakota's hand and helps her get up as she says that they should all just go home - Casper tries not to let Morgan grab his hand, but she succeeds.

In the confessional, Morgan expresses that the situation is very sad and that the contestants don't know what to do next but to try and deal with the greif - Scarlett pollishing her trophies, Dakota cuddling Siffy and Casper playing his DS. Morgan then grimly states that she only has one way to deal with her sadness.

There are shots of Morgan opening a drawer, stroking a large knife and lifting it above her body whilst kneeling - a heartbeat can be heard. Just as she is about to stab herself, Casper stops her and forces her to drop the knife. She cries and tells him that she will never see him again if she is kicked off the show, he knows this but says that "Killing yourself is never the answer" and hugs Morgan - who seems overjoyed that Casper saved her and is now hugging her.

Joe sees what's happenning and asks what's going on - asking if the contestants know they are not being kicked off the show, contrary to their beliefs. Dakota asks Joe if they are being replaced, and he replies that no one is being replaced - except Barry and Ross, as stated by Casper. Joe has forgotten who those two are and then tells the contestants to welcome Private Eye's two newest contestants.


 * This explains why there were audition tapes - these people were competing for two wildcard positions.

Previews
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